I can think of absofuckinglutely nothing better than stuffing your face until you are just a paralyzed, beached whale on the couch. You know, when you find yourself feeling both satisfied and ashamed.
...but mostly satisfied. My car ride home is even more fun:
Some may think I sound cocky...but sorry I'm not sorry. The second thing that I am thankful for is hot people.
Would it kill us all to be a little more like Queen Beyonce?
I have always had a massive respect for hot people and will continue until my dying day to offer them the love and attention they so desperately do not deserve. Come to think of it, I'd actually like to make a special shout out to Alexander Skarsgard.
For him, I expect us all to show tremendous gratitude. I am just so damn thankful.
He educates the less fortunate looking people around the world about what it means to be beautiful. He has taught me time and time again that I am not worthy and I am forever indebted to him for this lesson. The third thing that I am thankful for is my phone.
As someone who is not a big fan of people in general, my phone allows me to maintain shallow communication and relationships with people that I never want to see or hear from. This way I can throw an "LOL" or a "yeah I hear ya, girl" in there every now and then instead of actually sitting around and listening to their "jokes" or "problems" and pretending I care.
Can you get over these people? Troubling me with their issues? Boring me with their gabbing? Don't they know who I am???
My phone allows me to remain anti-social and self-absorbed. JUST THE WAY I LIKE IT!!!!!!
The last thing I am thankful for are ALL of the Real Housewives.
Yes, even you Taylor Armstrong. I don't want you to feel left out or anything. These women MAKE my Sunday and Monday evenings. This week's episodes of Real Housewives of Atlanta & Beverly hills were impeccable.
I have been thinking about it and have decided that these ladies are practically my sisters... my bosom buddies, if you will. They teach me what it is to be a "real" housewife. I must be unemployed, hire three nannies to watch one child, throw birthday parties for my three year old kid and not invite them to it, have at least three housekeepers, and fight with the other "real" housewives all day long. Thank you ladies. Your wisdom is priceless.
Okay everyone, enjoy your Thanksgiving thoroughly! I hope you all dig deep just as I did to think about the things we should be truly thankful for. Check in for another post soon.
Make good choices!!!